Sometimes, the Bible is really clear about how we should act as men of God. For example, the book of James lets us know that we should avoid being quick to anger: “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger” (James 1:19).
The reason is simple. We are called to be slow to anger because “human anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness” (James 1:20). In other words, we can never become more like Jesus—the ultimate goal of the Christian life—until we learn how to avoid being quick to anger.
Is anger always bad?
In a nutshell, the answer is “no.” Anger is not always a bad thing. After all, Jesus got angry when He cleaned out the temple (Mark 11:15-17). We tend to call this “righteous indignation” or “righteous anger,” and it’s appropriate because the things that upset God should upset us as well.
But human nature often takes something God meant for good and skews it toward evil. That’s when we run into problems. We allow our sinful character to get the best of us, and we end up being quick to anger instead of slow to anger. Selfishness and a lack of self-control lead to sinful anger, which (as James said) doesn’t help us become more like Jesus.
What can we do?
Admittedly, anger is not easy to resolve. We can’t just wave a magic wand and make it disappear. Some of us may struggle with it more than others, but we all have a short fuse from time to time.
The good news is that God understands our weaknesses, including our tendency to be quick to anger. And He offers solutions that allow us to manage our anger in a healthy and constructive way. Here are five things you can do to help you avoid being quick to anger.
Start by understanding your triggers
While we may struggle with being quick to anger, our tempers rarely come out of the blue. We have triggers, things that set us off. These could take the form of stress, hunger, fatigue, or any number of issues. But if we can identify them, we can avoid them—or, at least, prepare to deal with them in a way that won’t involve an emotional explosion.
Find an outlet
Sometimes, we’re quick to anger because we haven’t done anything to release our emotions. If we can find an outlet, we can “burn off” the anger before it overwhelms us. This could involve exercise, breathing techniques, rest, or journaling. If it allows you to release the tension without putting someone else in the crosshairs, it’s probably a solid outlet.
See the situation for what it is
Often, anger is the result of faulty perceptions. The way we interpret a situation can differ greatly from the reality of our circumstances. So, instead of blowing our stack, we can avoid being quick to anger by slowing down and taking a careful look at what’s going on. This also allows us to define the problem accurately, which equips us to find solutions that will work.
Spend time in the Word and prayer
Two of your most powerful weapons as a Christ follower are the Bible and prayer. Each provides a unique and valuable connection with God and His plan for our lives. We’ve already seen how verses like James 1:19-20 can help you understand anger better. Meditating on verses about anger reveals God’s perspective on what your life should look like. And prayer gives you a chance to talk to the One who created you and knows you better than you know yourself. As the apostle Peter noted, we can cast our cares upon God because He truly cares for us (1 Peter 5:6-7). That includes our struggles with being quick to anger.
Talk to a professional
As noted, overcoming anger issues is not an easy task. For some, it could be the biggest challenge they’ve ever faced. But, thankfully, no one has to face the challenge alone. Professional counselors and therapists are trained to walk with you through anger issues. They can offer coping mechanisms and strategies that will help you navigate the landmines and avoid being quick to anger. Everyone needs help at times. The ministry of a solid Christian counselor can make a huge difference for you and your family.
Change is possible
As you reflect on your tendency to be quick to anger, you might feel like you’re fighting an uphill battle. It might seem easier to throw in the towel before the battle even gets going. But remember that with God, all things are possible.
The Bible is filled with stories of people who overcame anger with God’s help. For example, James and John, two of Jesus’s closest disciples, were also known as “sons of thunder” because of their anger issues (Mark 3:17). Yet, Jesus transformed their lives.
Likewise, the apostle Paul was a man driven by anger before He met Jesus on the road to Damascus. While he was sure his anger was “righteous,” he made a career out of persecuting Christians and, in some cases, approving their executions. After meeting Christ, everything changed for him.
The same God who worked in the lives of these men can work in your life as well. He can set you free from the emotional chains that are holding you down. He can help you avoid being quick to anger. With Jesus, change is possible.