As a kid, you probably played “Follow the Leader.” One person took the lead, and everyone else followed the example.
Well, whether you realize it or not, you’re still following a leader in life. Wise men learn to lead like Jesus. They imitate His example and focus on doing things the way He would do them.
And the most important place you can lead like Jesus as a man is in your home.
How Was Jesus as a Leader?
Jesus had a mom, an earthly father, and some half-siblings, so family was important to Him. But He never had a wife, and He never had kids. So, it’s fair to wonder what exactly we can learn from Him about leading our families.
Well, think of it this way: the best leadership principles for organizations tend to transfer smoothly to the experiences of families. And we know that Jesus was a great Leader when it came to dealing with people—whether they agreed with Him or not. He was also a spiritual leader to many. So, learning how to lead like Jesus can teach us a lot about navigating our roles as husbands and dads.
Ten ways to lead like Jesus
The Bible is filled with great leadership principles, including examples of how Jesus led. The Gospels reveal how He modeled leadership during His time on earth. The New Testament letters explain how the early believers applied those leadership lessons in their day-to-day lives.
As you ponder what it means to lead like Jesus under your roof, reflect on the ten action steps listed below. These principles aren’t exhaustive because the Bible has more than we could ever digest in a single blog. But they are rooted in the life of Jesus, and they will give you some ideas for being a leader like Him in your home.
1. Learn from your heavenly Father.
The roles of husband and father are incredible challenges for men. Thankfully, you have the greatest example possible in your heavenly Father. Jesus understood that better than anyone. That’s why He found time to plug into His Father’s wisdom (Mark 1:35). While He prayed about the best way to conduct His ministry, you can pray about the best ways to support your family.
2. Invest in others.
Men who want to lead like Jesus get beyond themselves and invest in the lives of others. That’s what Jesus did with His disciples. He helped them become better versions of the people God created them to be. As a leader in your home, you should be investing in your wife and kids. You can pour into their lives and point them toward Jesus.
3. Meet needs.
The Bible is clear that men who lead like Jesus provide for the needs of their families. In fact, Paul told Timothy that any man who neglected that role had more in common with pagans than with Christ (1 Timothy 5:8). Leading like Jesus means meeting the members of your family where they are and making a difference in their lives—physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
4. Be a servant.
In general, men don’t like second place. But when it comes to leading like Jesus, you’re really coming in third. God comes first, and your wife and kids should rank second. Serving them requires humility, but that’s exactly how Jesus lived each day of His life. You also can teach them how to serve by setting an example of ministering to others around you.
5. Be trustworthy.
As you think about Jesus as a leader, you realize that He was a man of His word. He always kept His promises, and He always spoke truth—even when it was awkward for His listeners. Whether He was teaching His disciples or debating with religious leaders, people always knew where He stood. To lead like Jesus, you have to be trustworthy, too. People have to know that you’re steadfast (1 Corinthians 15:58) and that your word is your bond (Matthew 5:37; James 5:12).
6. Lead as an Intentional Father
Life doesn’t happen by accident. And if you’re going to lead like Jesus, you have to live with purpose. Everything He said and did consistently moved Him toward fulfilling God’s plan—the cross (Luke 9:51). You can become a leader like Jesus by identifying God’s purpose for your life and pursuing it with passion (Luke 9:23; Ephesians 5:15-16).
7. Love and forgive.
These are really two sides of the same coin. You cannot love without being willing to forgive, and you cannot forgive without love. Honestly, being a Christ-centered leader of your family will challenge both your love and your forgiveness. Your wife and kids are imperfect (like you), and they will hurt your feelings at times. But Jesus loved and forgave even the worst offenses (Luke 23:32-34). He can help you do the same.
8. Discipline yourself.
Paul was a powerful Christian leader, but he also understood that he needed self-discipline if he was going to lead like Jesus. He compared disciplining one’s self to an athlete preparing for an important competition (1 Corinthians 9:24-27). He leaned into whatever made him more like Jesus and rejected anything that might hold him back. Leading like Jesus requires disciplining yourself, making sure you do what’s right every chance you get. That’s the only way to become a leader worth following.
9. Live in community.
Manhood is a team sport. Old Testament writers talked about iron sharpening iron (Proverbs 27:17), but Jesus also demonstrated the importance of doing life with others. While He mentored His disciples, they also allowed Him to fellowship at a deep level. If you’re going to lead your family like Jesus, you need connections that keep you strong. You also need to attend church with your family. Men who lead like Jesus never try to go it alone.
10. Make sacrifices.
Jesus’s entire life was focused on sacrifice. Paul noted that Jesus left heaven and took on human flesh so He could offer the sacrifice for our sins (Philippians 2:5-11). He also said we are called to imitate this sacrificial mindset (v. 5). Jesus said the last would be first and the first would be last (Matthew 20:16). Regardless of what the sacrifice might look like, if you sacrifice for your wife and children, you will be leading like Jesus and they will follow.
Be sure to catch your breath
As you learn to lead like Jesus, don’t forget to take time for rest. Following His example and trying to become more like Him might tempt you to run full-throttle every moment of every day. But that really defeats the purpose because you can’t lead like Jesus if you wear yourself out.
In addition to His preaching, teaching, and healing, Jesus looked for times away from the chaos of ministry. He also challenged His disciples to do the same (Mark 6:30-31). No one benefits from burnout—not you, not your wife, and not your kids. If you want to lead like Jesus, follow His advice and find time to rest.
Are you ready to be the dad God called you to be? Take the Godly Father Assessment to see how you’re doing and where you can improve as a father!
