According to James 1:27, genuine believers minister to widows and focus on how to fix fatherlessness. Pure religion in God’s eyes, cares about the weak, the ones who can’t defend themselves. And, along with widows (a term that could include all single moms today), children with no father figures (or even disconnected fathers) in the home are on the list.
The Bible is filled with great principles and practical guidance for living the Christian life. On every page, we discover more about who God is and what He expects from us as godly men and women. But every once in a while, we come across a truth that summarizes our faith in a nutshell.
Hebrews 12:7
Fatherlessness leaves a mark
Before we dive too deeply into learning how to fix fatherlessness, though, we need to address two truths. First, fatherlessness is a complex issue with many causes. Kids can be left without a father figure because their dad died or because of a divorce. In other cases, their father simply left. So, any effort to fix fatherlessness has to recognize the unique situations involved. More important, we have to embrace the people affected. We don’t need to judge the circumstances, just bless the individuals.
Second, we need to acknowledge the negative impact of fatherlessness—regardless of its cause. Simply put, dads are incredibly important to families and to communities. Research tells us that more than 18 million kids in America live in a home with no father. That’s almost one in four children. And, in eight out of 10 single-parent homes, women are the ones trying to fill the role of both mother and father.
Statistically, kids from fatherless homes are more likely to suffer from mental health issues. They typically struggle more in school and have an increased chance of living in poverty and spending time in prison.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that all fatherless kids are going to end up that way. Countless men and women overcome the obstacle of a fatherless home to live healthy and productive lives. But the research also suggests that if our society could figure out how to fix fatherlessness, the impact would resonate across every level of our culture.
Three Steps Toward Fixing Fatherlessness
As a Christ follower, I believe that Jesus is the ultimate answer for every problem humans face. I believe sin is the root cause of human suffering, and I believe that He overcame sin by dying on the cross and rising from the dead. So, it should come as no surprise that my ideas about how to fix fatherlessness are rooted in the Bible.
As humans, we can’t really fix fatherlessness on our own. But we serve a God who can, and He wants to use us to be part of His solution. The three steps below are drawn from the truth of His Word. They are general, but they are also practical. That means that the specific steps you might take will look different from one situation to another, but you can do something to help fix fatherlessness.
1. Invest in fatherless children.
As mentioned, James 1:27 directly ties a genuine Christian walk with figuring out how to fix fatherlessness. But it’s not the only passage that challenges God’s people to help the helpless—including fatherless kids. For example, Deuteronomy 10:18, Psalm 82:3, and Isaiah 1:17 all urge us to defend the fatherless.
One important reason we should invest in fatherless children is that it allow us to reflect the character of God. In Psalm 68:5, God is called the “father of the fatherless.” He genuinely cares about fixing fatherlessness, and He wants us to be a part of His work.
2. Recapture the sanctity of marriage.
In the earliest chapters of the Bible, God established and blessed the institution of marriage (Genesis 2:18-25). In the law of Moses, He affirmed the sanctity of marriage relationships (Exodus 20:14). Later, Jesus repeated God’s take on marriage (Matthew 19:1-6), as did the apostle Paul in his letters to early churches (Ephesians 5:22-23; Colossians 3:18-19).
This emphasis on marriage is important to fixing fatherlessness because so many fatherlessness issues are related to marriage issues. Whether it’s preventing divorce or preventing abandonment, helping men better understand what God expects from them as husbands can have a tremendous impact on their role as fathers.
3. Affirm the nobility of fatherhood
We live in a culture where fatherhood is under attack. In the past, “father knows best” was assumed. Now, dads are often the punchline to a demeaning joke. If we’re going to learn how to fix fatherlessness, we have to remind men—and society—just how important dads are to families and communities.
From a biblical perspective, fathers are spiritual leaders (Deuteronomy 6:6-7). This alone gives them tremendous value and purpose. Plus, God refers to Himself as our heavenly Father, which also gives human fatherhood unique worth. While it’s important for men to do all they can to live up to this high standard, we can learn how to fix fatherhood by surrounding men with godly support and reminding them of the nobility of their call.
Remember the girls
As I worked on this blog, I spoke with a young woman who is wrapping up an internship in a counseling center. As we talked about the negative impact of fatherlessness, she mentioned something interesting. While we often focus on the problems dad’s absence creates for males, she actually deals with more females suffering from fatherlessness issues.
Among her clients, she has seen how fatherlessness creates insecurity and confusion among girls and women. Young girls with no solid father figure don’t learn how to deal with men appropriately. They have no role models for what to look for (and what to avoid) in a man, which often leads to relationship issues down the road.
Her advice was to remember the girls. Just like fatherless boys need godly male role models, daughters need to experience godly fathers, possibly a family member or a family friend.
Her words were a good reminder that fatherlessness has a negative impact on every child touched by this issue. That’s also a good reminder that every child benefits when we turn our attention to learning how to fix fatherlessness.
Not sure where you’re headed as a dad? Take the Godly Father Assessment to see now.
