Colossians 4:6 confession time. I’ve often not heeded the command of this Scripture. Paul exhorts us, “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.” Gracious speech—always. In context, he’s talking about our influence with those outside the faith, but I think this applies just as directly to how we talk in our own homes. I’m growing here, but, it’s been a slow grind. More often than not, my speech has been seasoned with something more like Tabasco sauce. Dad, if you want to have an increasingly effective influence with your children (and I know you do), you gotta learn the power of this verse. When our speech is flavored with grace, our kids will want to consume more of it. When it’s infused with a pinch of sarcasm, a dash of harshness, or a heaping spoonful of ridicule, our words are not very tasty. Let’s lay off the hot sauce and season our speech with love, grace, patience, and kindness. Mmm, mmm, good.

Have you ever caught yourself telling your kids, “Do as I say, not as I do?” Here’s the truth: your kids are going to do what you do. Right or wrong, your kids are going to follow in our footsteps. The question is not, “Will our kids follow our example?” The question is, “What example are you giving them to follow?” You need to be aware of your weaknesses as a dad, so you can work on eliminating them. Here are 3 ways to eliminate your weaknesses as a dad.

1. A dad can’t demand respect, he can only earn it. “If your verbal interaction is affirming and if your touch is always under control, you will be trustworthy.” – Jay Payleitner, 101 Things Great Dads do

2. “The true function of the teacher is to create the most favorable conditions for self-learning. True teaching is not that which gives knowledge, but that which stimulates pupils to gain it.” – Howard Hendricks, Teaching to Change Lives

3. “Only with difficulty does a man divest himself of self.” — Thomas à Kempis

4. Mark Merrill shared 10 practical ways to battle your sexual temptations. He says, “When our minds and hearts are occupied in the right place, sexual lust has little room to operate.”

What flavor? I dare you to ask your kids, especially if they’re older, what flavor or seasoning your words are often covered in. Let’s see if you’re more of a bathed-in-tabasco or glazed-in-honey kinda dad.

Make it a great week,

Kent Evans
Author of the The Manhood Journey, co-founder of Manhood Journey and Father On Purpose.

P.S. Was this Mountain Monday helpful? Tell me if you love it, hate it, or if there’s something you’d like in the next one.

Forward this to a dad you know who needs some encouragement.