I’ve got three kids, including two sons. While both of my boys are grown now and on their own, I still remember the shifting dynamics of our father-son relationship. Each brother was different from the other, but the ups and downs of doing life with them has been a great joy—and a great learning experience.

If you’re the dad of a son, you know what I’m talking about. Whether your boy is a curious child, a free-spirited teen, or a responsible adult, the task of moving him farther down the road toward manhood is a serious challenge. Thankfully, God has not left us hanging in this area. There are many father and son relationships in the bible that offer a wealth of information and insight at the turn of a page. 

Inspiration, not intimidation

Sometimes, guys can see the Bible as an intimidating book that we can never master. In a sense, that’s true. God is so immense and His Word is so deep, that it will take us a lifetime to even scratch the surface of what He has for us. 

But in another sense, the Bible is the most practical book ever composed. It’s filled with great insights for day-to-day living. And much of that inspiration comes from the real-life stories of real-life father and son relationships. These narratives of fathers and sons from the Bible remind us that our wins and losses are not unique. They have been common to generations of dads since the beginning of time.

Modern Problems Require Ancient Truths

To me, that’s encouraging. It means someone else has been there and done that long before me. And I can learn from what they did right and what they did wrong. 

In the list below, I’ve identified seven examples of father and son dynamics from the Bible. Most of the examples are positive. A couple are negative. But they all give insight into father and son relationships from the bible that are still relevant today. 

1. Unity: God and Jesus. Let’s get the most daunting father-son example out of the way first. Obviously, the relationship between God the Father and God the Son is different from any father and son relationship we nurture here on earth. It’s literally impossible to duplicate or to live up to. Still, it gives us a goal for our fathering. It sets the standard for how we are called to treat our sons—and even others (John 17)

2. Priorities: Abraham and Isaac. One of my favorite stories in the Bible is when God called Abraham to sacrifice Isaac in Genesis 22. After decades of waiting, Abraham faced a staggering choice: honor God or spare his son. Of course, Abraham had his priorities in line. He refused to put Isaac, the son of promise, above his relationship with his heavenly Father. He obeyed God even when it didn’t make sense. In fact, Hebrews 11:17-19 suggests that Abraham’s obedience was fueled by a faith that God would do something incredible and unexpected—which He did!

3. Favoritism: Isaac and Jacob/Esau. If you’ve got more than one son, you know sibling rivalry will enter the father and son relationship equation at some point. Isaac experienced it with his boys, Jacob and Esau. Unfortunately, he made the mistake of playing favorites (Genesis 25:27-28). Over time, that led to deception, anger, and turmoil. Favoritism devastated his family for decades (Genesis 27:1-46). What’s more, it became generational. Even after Jacob connected with God and reconciled with Esau, he followed Isaac’s footsteps by playing favorites with his sons; and the cycle produced similar results (Genesis 37:3-4).

4. Discipline: Eli and Hophni/Phineas. This is one of the saddest tales of a missed opportunity in all the accounts of fathers and sons in the Bible. Eli was a man of God, but he never really instilled that spiritual connection into the lives of his sons. As a result, they were rotten people and rotten leaders; and God ended up judging them harshly (1 Samuel 2:22-36; 4;10-11). Ironically, the prophet Samuel, who looked to Eli as a mentor, had the same trouble with his boys (1 Samuel 8:1-2).

5. Preparation: David and Solomon. David was a man after God’s own heart, but he wasn’t perfect as a person or as a dad. He made plenty of mistakes, and it wreaked havoc on his family. But one thing he did right was prepare his son, Solomon, to become king. First, he prepared him to build the temple by supplying most of what he needed for the job (1 Chronicles 29:1-9). Later, he prepared Solomon to rule well by warning him about dangerous people (1 Kings 2:1-12). By God’s grace, Solomon was the wisest man who ever lived, but he also enjoyed a solid father and son foundation laid by his dad.

6. Hope: The Prodigal Son. Yes, this father and son story from the Bible is about a fictional family made famous by Jesus’s parable (Luke 15:11-32). But it’s still a great example of how dads never give up on their kids. In reality, this dad had two problem sons. While one physically ran away, even the one who stayed home was disconnected spiritually and emotionally. In both cases, the father never stopped believing that things would get better. 

7. Mentoring: Timothy and Paul. Some fathers and sons from the Bible weren’t related by blood, but they were united at the heart. That’s the case with Paul and Timothy. The great apostle considered this young pastor his spiritual son (1 Timothy 1:1-2). Peter felt the same way about Mark (1 Peter 5:13). That’s a reminder that it’s OK to invest in the lives of others. Our first priority is our flesh and bone, but we can also make an impact on “sons” who don’t live under our roof or share our DNA. 

What about you?

When we look at the stories of father and son relationships in the bible, we see the triumphs and tragedies of men just like us. As dads, we understand the challenges that come from raising boys. As men, we remember the struggles that go hand-in-hand with becoming a man and finding your place in the world.

In some ways, these biblical narratives don’t share anything new about father and son relationships. They just put flesh on the life lessons we need to live wisely and love well. If we’ll pay attention to what our heavenly Father is sharing, it can make a huge difference in our relationships with our earthly sons.

Fathers are important. God says so. Research affirms it. The commitment you make to become a living example of the importance of dads in our society will speak volumes as well.

Not sure where you’re headed as a Godly Father? Take the Godly Dad Quiz to see now.