Love means different things in different settings. We claim to love God and family. We talk about loving friends, our country, dessert, and a week at the beach. In English, we use one word—love—to cover a multitude of emotions.
But do we really know what it means?
The ancient Greeks had the right idea. Instead of one word for “love,” they had four. And, since the New Testament was written in Greek, those four words leave their mark on God’s Word. So, what are the four types of love in the Bible? More importantly, what do they mean to our lives today?
Why You Need Love in Your Life
More than six decades ago, Christian writer and apologist C.S. Lewis wrote a book called The Four Loves. In it, he attempted to answer our main question, What are the four types of love in the Bible? The popularity of Lewis’s work has helped believers across generations get a better handle on what love is all about, especially from a biblical perspective.
While each of the loves is different, they all have their place in the lives of Christ followers. As men, some might come more easily to us than others, but they all deserve our attention. As you reflect on the four types of love in the Bible, examine your own heart. Listen to what God’s Spirit tells you about the gaps in your “love life.”
Most of all, look for opportunities to practice each of the loves in ways that honor God and encourage others.
4 Types of Love in the Bible:
1. Agape.
When people think about the four types of love in the Bible, agape usually tops the list. It describes God’s sacrificial love for us—and the love He longs for us to offer Him (John 21:15-16). It’s the love that defines who God is (1 John 4:8) and should define how we respond to other believers (1 Corinthians 13:4-8). It’s the love that identifies Christians as being different from the world (John 13:35).
Ultimately, it’s the love that led our heavenly Father to sacrifice His Son for the world (John 3:16).
2. Storge.
Obviously, loving God should be the priority of a Christian man’s life. But in answering the question, What are the four types of love in the Bible? We can’t ignore our responsibility to our family. That’s what storge is all about. It’s the affectionate, emotional love shared by husbands and wives, parents and kids, and brothers and sisters.
While storge never appears in the Scriptures, its impact is still felt. In Greek, the letter “a” (alpha) at the beginning of a word often turns that word into its opposite. In the New Testament, a form of astorgos appears twice (Romans 1:31; 2 Timothy 3:3). In both cases, it describes people who lack the capacity to love others. So, the negative of storge provides an example of who we should not become.
3. Phileo/Philia.
Both of these words are rooted in the Greek term philos, and both represent a friendly love. This biblical word for “love” is the ancient equivalent to male bonding. It’s brotherly love and affection. For example, it’s the love that moved Jesus to tears at Lazarus’s tomb (John 11:35-36). It’s also the love that Paul often expressed toward other Christians in his letters (Titus 3:15).
As a guy, this biblical type of love could make you a little uncomfortable. But the bond shared by brothers in Christ is vital to your growth as a man. You don’t have to be perfect at it, but you don’t want to ignore it, either.
4. Eros.
Of the four types of love in the Bible, eros poses the most danger. It describes romantic and sexual love. Like storge, eros does not actually appear in the Bible, but it doesn’t go without notice. The Old Testament book of Song of Songs is a celebration of sexual love, practiced well within the confines of marriage. Plus, warnings against practicing eros inappropriately are common themes in the book of Proverbs and throughout the New Testament.
That’s where the danger comes in. Inside marriage, eros is a wonderful gift from God. But outside those boundaries, it can lead to immorality and lust. Unchecked, it will tear your life and relationships apart at the seams.
It All Comes Back to God
So, a quick Greek lesson provides an answer to our initial question: What are the 4 types of love in the Bible? But to answer our second question—What do they mean to our lives today?—we need to go back to the basics.
God is love (1 John 4:8) and sets the standard for love. That means we can’t love others well until we truly embrace His love for us and learn to express our love for Him. His love is the glue that holds every relationship—every opportunity to demonstrate love—together.
God loved to the fullest (John 3:16). He made the greatest sacrifice imaginable so we could have a relationship with Him. That kind of love goes beyond any human measure, but it’s a love we’re called to imitate all the same.
So, as you think about the four loves in the Bible, focus on the true Author of love. Let Him teach you how to love Him and how to love others well.
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