Let’s get clear on who you are. Romans 8:12-17 can reset your identity, your direction, and your future, so you can lead your family from truth instead of pressure.

#1 We are debtors, not to the flesh (v. 12). Paul’s saying you don’t owe your old life anything. Sounds strange, right? “Debtors” assumes obligation, but you’re not bound to who you used to be.

Still, don’t we feel compelled to drift back? Sure, but the Spirit lives in you now. Your new calling is to “put to death the deeds of the body.” This is an everyday thing, like pulling weeds before they take over the yard. God didn’t just forgive you; He helps you live differently.

#2 All who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God (v. 14). This isn’t about proving yourself; it’s about recognizing who you are. You can’t earn this, but you can live from it. Being “led” means daily guidance, like a shepherd with his sheep.

The voice pushing pressure and performance, and saying that you’re never enough, is NOT God. You’ve received the Spirit of adoption. Think about your kids: Do they have to perform perfectly to earn your approval? That shift changes everything. You’re not leading to prove yourself; you’re leading as a son of God.

#3 If children, then heirs (v. 17). Being a child of God means you’re not just in the family; you have a future. “[H]eirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ…” That’s crazy to think about: Everything He has is yours?! Paul’s honest here: “provided we suffer with him…” This isn’t punishment, but how God shapes.

So when life gets hard, don’t check out, get silent, or rage quit. Breathe and stay clear-headed. You’re not falling behind. God’s getting you ready for the next thing.

3 Biblical Money Lessons Every Teen Needs from Dad: Your teenager is going to learn about money from someone, and the world already has a curriculum ready for them (yeah, that’s not going to work out well). Here is what a Christian dad can offer instead.

Temptation, Fatherhood, and the Way of Escape: Lawson and I got honest about something some dads are managing privately instead of actually dealing with it. If you have a secret struggle you keep thinking you can handle on your own, this one is for you.

Dallas Willard: “Grace is not opposed to effort. It is opposed to earning. Effort is action. Earning is attitude. You have never seen people more active than those who have been set on fire by the grace of God.”

Think about one thing that keeps pulling you back: anger, lust, checking out, harsh words, self-pity, whatever it is. Don’t just carry guilt about it. Deal with it. Give it to God. Take one simple step forward. Maybe that looks like owning an issue with an apology, taking a breath before you react, or pulling another guy in to walk with you through something.

Ask: Where am I still stuck, trying to prove myself instead of realizing that I belong to God?

Remember: You don’t owe your old way of life anything. You belong to God.

Kent Evans
Author of Don’t Bench Yourself, co-founder of Manhood Journey

P.S. Was this Mountain Monday helpful? Tell me if you love it, hate it, or if there’s something you’d like in the next one.

Forward this to a dad you know who needs some encouragement.