I have five children and each one is individually wired. Sure, there are some shared traits. A couple are more headstrong. One has off the charts drawing skills. Some are more athletically inclined. Others are fast readers. One thing I learned along the way – God has wired each of my sons (all of us, really) completely uniquely. There are no exact copies. Amazing. Yet, if we’re not careful, we can find ourselves trying to squeeze our kids into certain molds. We may bark the age old classic, “Why can’t you be more like your brother?”. It seems that Isaac in the Old Testament had a tendency to play favorites. We read in Genesis, “Isaac loved Esau because he ate of his game, but Rebekah loved Jacob.” (‭Genesis‬ ‭25:28‬). Can’t you just sense the parental tug of war? It’s easy to relate best to our kids who are most like us. Yet, as a dad, I want to affirm and encourage my children in their own unique design. God has given each of my boys unique gifts, talents, preferences and callings. I don’t want any one of my sons trying to be exact copies of anyone else. I don’t want to play favorites. I want to spur my kids on to love and good deeds, individually.

The crushing side effects of lust: Lust may feel like a bit of a harmless sin sense “I’m just looking.” But that is a big mistake. If left undealt with, lust can not only poison our heart but harden it. And a hard heart can leave us numb to God’s calling and leading.

Helping kids with anxiety and creating a peaceful home w/ Stephen Kendrick: In today’s world, technology and pop culture can often have a greater influence on our kids than we do. So, why do our kids become depressed after watching other people’s highlight reels on social media, and what can we do about it? Father and Christian film producer Stephen Kendrick shares some practical steps dads can take to help their kids find inner peace as they navigate the modern social arena. Having a peaceful home is every dad’s goal; we just need to trust God and cherish our families to help get us there.

“When you encourage others, you in the process are encouraged because you’re making a commitment and difference in that person’s life. Encouragement really does make a difference.” – Zig Ziglar

“Never forget that everyone needs encouragement. And everyone who receives it – young or old, successful or less-than-successful, unknown or famous – is changed by it.” – John C. Maxwell

“Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You’ll realize this as soon as they’re born, and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.” – Ray Romano

Identify their design. Do you play favorites with your children? Would you like to stop, and start reinforcing their unique God given design? That often starts with identifying how they are wired, and not just based on physical attributes (she runs so fast!) or skills (he’s so good at math!), but based on giftedness. What do you see in them that God has pre-loaded into their operating system? A heart to help others? A desire for justice? A unique ability to listen? Mentally walk through each of your children and see if you can build a list of their unique design. Often, this is a great way to help us better relate to and encourage our children.

Kent Evans
Author of The Manhood Journey, co-founder of Manhood Journey and Father On Purpose.

P.S. Was this Mountain Monday helpful? Tell me if you love it, hate it, or if there’s something you’d like in the next one.

Forward this to a dad you know who needs some encouragement.