7 characteristics of a father according to the bible.

When it comes to characteristics of a father according to the bible, I want to be clear. Scripture is talking to all believers in the verses I’m about to discuss. But, this is a blog for encouraging fathers. I’m writing to challenge you as a dad to think and do these seven characteristics from Scripture. I hope you’ll allow me that!

Listen, I’m always learning something new—like how to adjust the time limits on my kids’ devices. After a bunch of annoying questions about “why” and going back and forth with my oldest daughter, I spit out, “Just wait until you have kids. Then, you’ll understand.” Not my greatest moment—and that happened last week.

So, clearly, I have it all figured out. But, I’m trying to bring kids up who think and act like Jesus followers instead of pagans. Yes, I’m aware of the pull to be a hypocrite. If I’m going to point my kids to God, I need to think and act like Jesus myself. Let me point you to what’s given me comfort. Paul gives us some instructions for what to think and how to act in his writing to the church in Philippi.

Here’s the deal: We can’t only play defense. When it comes to battling culture, we have to play offense. 

Have you ever heard this story? One evening, an elderly Cherokee brave told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. “My dear one, the battle between two ‘wolves’ is inside us all. One is evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority. and ego. The other is good. It is: joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.” The grandson thought about it for a moment and then asked his grandfather: “Which wolf wins?” The old Cherokee replied, “The one you feed.”

Paul’s writing to the church and fellow believers (read: us) and he’s saying “feed the good wolf”—”feed your thoughts well”. Think and do the right things and you’ll be better examples to a watching world. Let’s look at Philippians 4:8-9.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.” —Philippians 4:8-9 (NIV)

7 characteristics of a father according to the Bible.

In his letter to the Philippians, Paul is encouraging the believers in Philippi to look different compared to the pagans around them. The whole point for Paul is that his readers renew their lives so that—no matter the circumstances—we can find peace in Jesus.

Verses 8 and 9 have two sets of lists. These two lists are separated by their own verbs. The list in verse 8 mentions to “think about such things” or logizesthe. The idea here is much deeper than simply thinking. Paul’s tells the church to deeply concern themselves with these things. The second list in verse 9, we are to “put into practice” or prassete. Paul’s merging mental thought and ethical concern. For Paul, you think right—you act right.

Protip: Read verse 8 saying the verb phrase “think about what is…” before each attribute. Read verse 9 saying the verb phrase “do what is…” before each attribute. This helps see the intention from Paul’s writing.

What the godly dad thinks

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” —Philippians 4:8

Remember, as a dad, you have the most influence on your kids—not culture. Yes, you should look to protect your child—set up all of the boundaries you can. But, let’s dig into the real battle Paul’s writing about here‚ what are minds and thoughts are fixed on. Paul understood the power of our thought life—especially writing from prison. Paul points out seven qualities that should characterize us as Christians.

#1 Think about what is TRUE: this means “truthfulness, dependability.” Anxiety is more likely when false things fill your mind rather than truth.

#2 Think about what is NOBLE: the idea here is what’s “honorable, worthy of respect.” Think about how you can be fair and right to others. Thinking noble thoughts will help you stay away from silly arguments that don’t matter.

#3 Think about what is JUST: this means “pure” or “holy” in relation to God. Think about what’s pure, not things that are impure. This means over your entire life—everything from sex to worship.

#4 Think about what is LOVELY: think about what’s lovely, not repulsive. Idea is to please where possible, and win other people’s admiration and affection.

#5 Think about what is ADMIRABLE: this means “praiseworthy, attractive,”. Think about what’s commendable, not wrong or inaccurate. Think about what’s admirable, not stuff that is shameful.

#6 Think about what is EXCELLENT: Think about what’s morally excellent, not filth like unbelievers. You are different than the world.

#7 Think about what is PRAISEWORTHY: means worthy of praising God. Think on what is worthy of praise—not things that aren’t.

After this great list, Paul says: think about such things. If we think on these things and pray—we’ll find peace. For us to be more like Jesus, we have to renew our minds every day. What we think matters.

How would the following things change if you renewed your mind and thought about what is true, noble, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, worthy of praise in the following areas: 

• Stuff you watch
• Books you read
• Music you listen to

Verse 8 reads like we should be philosophers who think about stuff all of the time. Thankfully, Paul wrote the next line about putting these things into practicing. Now Paul turns to the practical. Let’s look at the list again. This time, instead of saying “think” say “do”.

#1 Do what is TRUE: this means you seek truth. You are truthful in your dealings. You are dependable. In a lying world, you are known for saying and doing what is true.

#2 Do what is NOBLE: you do what is  “honorable, worthy of respect.” At the very least, a pagan world should recognize you are a believer by how you honor others. You should not be known as a person who disrespects others. We are to be fair and right to people. We pay our debts. Our word is our bond. This is the way of a Jesus follower.

#3 Do what is JUST: You do what is just and “holy” in relation to God. You can’t be described as unjust. No one would describe you as impure in your actions.

#4 Do what is LOVELY: You do things that are lovely, not sick or gross. You’re about restoring things, not tearing them down. This attribute can sound weird as a guy. Here’s the thing—you should serve others, do what is lovely, caring, and pleasing—not what is unlovely or wrong. You care so much about God that others know you love them. You bring peace instead of chaos. Chuck Colson would call this “being winsome”.

#5 Do what is ADMIRABLE: You aren’t seeking to be offensive just to get a rise out of someone. You do what is commendable, not wrong. Your wife and kids aren’t ashamed of your actions. They don’t think of you as a hypocrite—saying one thing outside of the home but doing something different inside of the home. You have a good reputation.

#6 Do what is EXCELLENT: You are morally excellent. This takes pointing to Christ with your life—by how you act and how you serve.

#7 Do what is PRAISEWORTHY: You praise God with your life. You show this by how you give your time each day and week. This makes a life that is worthy of praise or not—to God. You testify of God to a watching world by how you praise God. Imagine spending more time on spiritual disciplines and worshipping God than on watching “breaking news”.

Paul’s concerned about his readers having peace. How is peace found? By thinking right things and be doing right things. If you have organized your thoughts and live according to His ways, life won’t be perfect, but you’ll find peace. The disciplined pursuit of the godly dad finds peace and joy. Is that what your kids see in you?

When life feels overwhelming and too busy, the answer is discipline—renew your thoughts and actions. Can we really influence our families for good—with peace and joy in our homes? Paul says, “yes, just look at my life.” Boom. Truth bomb deployed. We should live in such a way that we can say, “Look at me. You can do what I do. Because I’m following God.”

Are you able to say with confidence to your wife and kids, “what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things” in life? What about these areas, to name a few: 

• Stuff you watch on TV, YouTube, and Netflix
• What leaders you follow
• When and how you worship

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