If you struggle as an angry dad, you’ll understand this story. A few months ago, I was at an amusement park with my family. The coolest part of this trip? It was paid for by a relative. A generous brother-in-law took our whole family. We had the fast passes where you can get on the rides ahead of everybody else. You’re basically royalty at the park!
The experience was great. But, late in the night, my son’s fast pass messed up. Here we are trying to hustle through some rides and the park wouldn’t let him on the next ride. I got frustrated. I got genuinely angry with this worker at the amusement park. It should’ve been no big deal to me. Ahhh!
But, I struggle with anger. Do you have trouble with anger? We’ve talked to thousands of dads, one of the most common struggles we hear is about anger. Anger with our kids. Anger with our spouse. Can you relate? As Christians, God gives us the power to overcome our anger. Let’s walk through a key Scripture for finding anger’s antidote.
Do you have any trouble with anger? Do you feel like you know how to deal with anger as a dad? Tons of dads say they struggle with it. I sure am one of them.
I’ve become angry with my boys more times than I can count. I’m not proud of it, and God’s helping me get better and better in this area.
Anger is often “code” for our desire to be in complete control. We don’t want to clean up a mess, so every spill ticks us off. Our kids won’t listen to us, so we fly off the handle. We want things our way, on our timeline, with our preferences—anything beyond that makes us mad.
I’ve had James 1:19-20 as my “annual theme verse” for a few years running!
Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. — James 1:19-20
Let’s consider two ways to rid ourselves of anger:
#1 The angry dad can raise his anger threshold.
This isn’t easy, but it’s essential. We need for fewer things to make us angry. We should be “hard” to get to the deadly sin of anger. Like the Cedar Point trip, really? That made me angry?!
What if we were only angry about what God is angry about? Consider some of the fruits of the spirit are love, peace, joy, patience… Let’s agree as dads that we’re going to try to have fewer things actually make us angry.
#2 The angry dad can control his temper.
Some things will make us angry, but then we need to decide how we will respond. How can we ensure we “don’t sin” in our anger as it says in Ephesians 4:26? You can overcome anger. Some of the other fruits of the spirit are gentleness and self-control. As James tells us, man’s anger doesn’t bring about the righteousness of God.
One note on this: physical abuse is never okay. So, if you say you “struggle with anger” and that means you’re physically hurting members of your family, you don’t struggle with anger. You are an abuser and need to get help.
Your Mission
The gospel of Jesus Christ should help us rid ourselves of anger. We can realize as we submit our lives to Him, He can be in total control and we don’t have to be in control. Your mission this coming week is two-fold.
First, if you ever struggle with anger, memorize James 1:19-20. Get your wife and kids in on the play, and by this time next week, you should easily have it committed to memory.
Second, if you want a bigger challenge, check out the Anger Free Dad digital course.
